Turbulence
by Scarlet Pikachu
Summary: Sola, plagued by rapid hallucinations is in a internal struggle that is also causing external damage. Can the recovering pill-popper maintain herself enogh to keep a hold of her new home? Or will a familiar face from her past reflect her future instead?


I don't own Pokemon, I do own my characters however.

Sola's in a delimma, read on fans!

And remember to be nice and . . .

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The feeling is so uneasing. My body feels tingly all over and my heart feels really fuzzy, as does my mind. I try to move, but my feet feel heavy and I cannot do anything except stand there frozen staring blankly ahead. A pair of eyes stares at me, but their owner is shrouded by the darkness that surrounds me. The eyes are all I can make out, but something about them makes me feel lightheaded and giddy. "Who are you?" I ask, voice less than a whisper. The eyes merely stare back unresponsive. "Who are you?" I ask once more. "And why do you make me feel so strange?" But still I got no response. The need to see the face those eyes are set in makes me approach the eyes despite feeling so unnerved. Then there's the edge of a cliff and it's too late for I'm already in a free-fall.

And then, the dream ends, same as it has so many times before . . .

I awoke, eyes dilated with adrenaline before letting out a frustrated sigh. "Stupid dream, it's always ending the same, always repeating itself." I mutter before sitting up and pushing the blanket off of myself. Without even blinking I knew where I am. I'm in Alice's house. _Alice . . ._ I think to myself. _She sure was kind to let me live here in her house. _I stand up and fold my blanket and set it in the middle of my bed (which is a laundry basket that Alice said I could have if I wanted) I sat it on top of the round fluffy pillow that used as a mattress.

"Hey, Sola, are you awake?" A voice asked. I turned and said, "Yeah Puccha, I'm awake," I reply. _Puccha . . ._ I smile as my mind repeats the Pikachu's name several times. I had become very good friends with the male mere hours after meeting him. To think that Fanfiction would ever kick me out in the first place, and then I ended up getting kicked out into the streets on a rainy day to boot! I was and still am sincerely grateful to Puccha for finding me. I was and still especially grateful when Alice and him gave me a place to stay as well. "Sola!" A voice suddenly calls out and I shake my head before opening my eyes.

There stood Puccha before me, eyes laced with confusion and a small hint of worry. "Why didn't you answer me? I asked you if you wanted waffles or pancakes." He said. "Oh, okay. Sorry I was spacin'" I replied using my slang word for spacing out. "So waffles or pancakes?" He repeated. "You already forgot that I don't like pancakes?" I say in a teasing tone. "I like waffles better because-"

"You get to count all the squares!" he chimed in knowing full well what I would say next. "Right on," I said smiling and giving him a thumb up along with a small giggle. "Okay then, I'll tell Alice that you want waffles. How long will you be?" I pause briefly to calculate how long it would be before replying, "Four minutes should be all." I reply. "Alright I'll go ahead and go tell her then." He said with a smile. I watched the Pikachu go, wondering how someone like him: cute and innocent in appearance and in personality, could break so many things in such little time. With a dismissing wave I decided to go groom myself.

I enter the bathroom and hop up onto a chair that Alice had put there so I would be high enough to reach the sink. When I looked into the mirror I couldn't resist smiling at my mussy furred reflection. "Good morning Sola how are you?" I ask, talking to myself and smoothing my ruffled fur. "Oh, I'm just fine self, how are you?" I reply and splash some water onto my face. As I wash away the grains of sand left behind from the Sandman's visit last night. A voice speaks. "I'm the same as usual," and I frown before looking up. I gaze blankly at the Mew who suddenly smiles from the other side of the mirror.

The Mew, knowing it held my full attention now held up a bottle so I could see it clearly. Then, popping the cap off she tilted back her head and poured the contents into her gaping maw. I only briefly saw the pills before they vanished upon her having closed her mouth. "Yummy!" She said after swallowing. She rubbed her tummy while smirking. I shook my head. ". . ." I gawped. "You know you're drooling, right?" The Mirror Mew said. I blinked before realizing she was right. "W-who are you?" I asked and I felt my paws tremble. "Why, I'm you of course." It replied. "No. I don't do that anymore." I said and my mind whispered. _Why not?_ "No, you don't, but that doesn't mean you can't." I shake my head. "No!" I say and hop down from the chair before fleeing from the bathroom.

My nerves were frayed as I sat down in my chair and half-heartedly stabbed at my waffles. "Well?" Puccha asks and I jerk my head up before looking blankly at him. "Well, what?" I ask. "How many?" He says. "How many what?" At that the Pikachu laughs. "Squares of course!" He says laughing harder. I glanced down, realizing that I had failed to proceed with my daily routine of proudly exclaiming the number 32 (which was always the same since I only eat two waffles for break feast). Alice glances up now and turns to look at me and I know my odd behavior hasn't gone unnoticed. I can sense her as she analyzes my behavior. "Is everything okay Sola?" She asks sweetly. I pause. _Is it?_ Even I'm uncertain about that.

The three weeks that had passed since Alice and Puccha took me in were hard. I had suffered some severe withdrawals and even hallucinated for hours on end. But despite all of it I refuse to tell them about the severe pill-popping problem that still holds me in its grip no matter how hard I try to escape it. And despite the fact that my body continued to feel like it would implode any minute I had not touched a single pill in the three weeks and IO never plan to touch one ever again. I was not going to let my addiction take away my home ever again.

"No, nothing's wrong. I was just lost in thought is all." I said smiling before glancing down. "Yes, thirty-two!" I exclaim in my best happy voice. It must sound believable enough since Alice looks satisfied and returns to cooking. As soon as I was certain that I was out of the spotlight I allow my thoughts to return to their turbid state while I ate my waffles. I finished quickly and sat my fork down. "Can I wash them?" I ask hopeful. She smiles before nodding. "Yes!" I cry while grabbing Puccha's and my dirty dishes and heading over to the sink after I hop down from my chair.

"I'm going to watch some T.V. Is that alright with you Sola?" The Pikachu asks and I nod. Alice pats me on the shoulder, "If you ever want to talk about anything, I'm here and I'll listen." She whispers before going to the living room where Puccha was watching T.V.

I felt myself smile whilst feeling somewhat eased at her words. I plugged the drain and turned the water on, turning the temperature to lukewarm while adding the dish soap and finally putting all of the dishes in to soak. I hum to myself while waiting for a few minutes. As soon as I think the syrup and crumbs have become pliable I grab the sponge and pull the drain. I scrub each dish vigorously, washing the suds off before drying them. They were shining to the point that I could almost see myself in them. I dried and stacked them while a thought made me pause. _Maybe I should tell Alice about my problem . . . No! I can handle this on my own! I'll be fine._ I nod my head firmly and decide that I'll find a way to deal with this by myself.

"Just because you don't do it anymore doesn't mean you can't." My eyes widen and I look down at the last plate that I was currently drying. There she was! The Mew smiled, "Why do you persist in behaving? Don't you miss the good times? Come on remember the fun times. Like when you used to stumble around whilst flying high. ." She said, telling me all about how it felt as though I didn't know. "Shut up," I snarl. "You know you want to!" She crooned before continuing, "The pang of the chemicals as they enter your blood stream instantaneously, the throb of them fusing with your body . . ."

"Shut up!" I yell, nerves fraying and anger boiling. "Sola? What's wrong?" Alice calls from the living room and I reply as fast as I can. "It's nothing, Alice." I say. "Okay," she sounds suspicious. My paws clutch the plate hard. Mirror Mew smirks and says, "What about the peak? You know, where you're at the top and then you jump off into that oblivion of bliss. Don't tell me you don't miss that or the-" I cut her off, "Shut the hell up," I whisper seething. In my anger I throw the plate down, it shatters and suddenly I'm alone once more. No reflection, no Puccha, no Alice. The smashing plate was not very loud, which meant that I could pick up all the pieces and clean up the floor without Alice knowing right away.

I grab the larger chunks of the plate while wiping the smaller shards into a pile with my tail. I winced as six or seven shards imbedded themselves into my tail. I threw the pieces into the trash before I swept the smallest shards up with a real broom. Then things got fuzzy. Before I know it I'm there, lying slumped against the counter. I notice that my paws and feet are bleeding as well. _Stop it!_ My mind says referring to the bleeding. I grab the dishtowel that I'd discarded mere minutes ago and hold it against my paws and feet while wondering. _Why am I so damn unlucky?_ Things get grey and blurry after that.

. . .

"Hey Sola . . ." _Puccha?_ The name is frazzled but still recognizable. "Sola!" I feel paws shake me. I should open my eyes. . . . I awake to see a concerned Pikachu staring at me; his paws are holding another, cleaner towel against my still bleeding cuts. "Hu-hey, Puccha." I say casually. "Sola, you're lying in a puddle of blood." He says. I sit up and smile guiltily. "I'm sorry," I say. Alice speaks now, "What happened Sola?" I look up at her, my soul weighed down with guilt, my internal pain out ruling the external. "I dropped one of your plates after I finished washing it. I-it broke and I tried to clean it up before anyone walked in, but I kept getting cut. . . ." I say, making sure to omit Mirror Mew's part in it all. Alice's green eyes shift. "I heard you talking earlier. Who were you talking to?" Crap! I must have forgotten about her hearing me when I was yelling at Mirror Mew. "I was just talking to myself." Okay, that was a crappy cover-up.

She buys it though. "Alright . . . But we'll going to need to do something about those cuts. Possibly we might need to put you on antibiotics-" I feel a shiver shoot down my spine, "No!" I shout. Alice gives me a look as if thinking me delirious. "Why not?" She asks. _Yeah, why not?_ My thoughts echo. "Because," I begin, fidgeting, "I'm allergic to medication." I lie. _Oh yeah, like that's even close to the truth. _My mind jeers. "Allergic? Are you serious? Not every pill has the same ingredients in it you know." I nod, "I know, but I'm allergic to the ten most commonly used ingredients." I say, trying my best to look sincere. _Now you're becoming a habitual liar. _"Hmm," Alice looks at me with a hint of doubt in her eyes. I cross mental fingers in hopes that she won't inquire further.

"Really?" Puccha asks and I can tell he had interrupted Alice's thinking. I nod. "That's too bad. I'll go get a pair of tweezers and some bandages along with some disinfectant. After all, who knows what germs might have gotten imbedded in your flesh." He says as he leaves. I tremble a bit. "T-thanks." I say softly. My mind wonders if I would ever be able to look at a pill filled bottle without feeling the pang of temptation and the grasp of addiction. I look up at Alice who looks a bit saddened by my behavior. "Alice." I say and she gives me an attentive look. "Yes, Sola?" She replies. "After Puccha's done bandaging my wounds may I go out?" I ask. She muses the thought for a while before replying. "I suppose you can. You will be back, right?"

Just looking into her green eyes makes me want to own up to everything, spill my guts and pray that her response would fare better than the one I knew I'd get would. But I shook my head sternly. "Sure I'll be back later. I promise." I replied. Alice smiled wanly, "Then it's fine with me."

I can't help but revel in how gentle Puccha is. He went straight to disinfecting my feet, which stung like a bitch might I add. Then he did my paws. As soon as he finishes he wraps them in gauze. He then uses the tweezers to pry each piece of glass out of my tail. Each time I winced, the previously punctured flesh bled anew. He wrapped the majority of my tail up, only the very end had gone unscathed. I thanked him graciously before exiting through the Poke-door.

Once I was outside I took a deep breath. "What's wrong with me? Am I dying?" I wondered aloud and stared balefully at my bandages. _Maybe a walk will help. _I think before taking the path that would lead directly to the park. I'd been outside Alice's house many a time before, but the day had never felt as ominous as it did today. I pass a man selling newspapers; he doesn't even give me a second look. I guess it was a good idea to go out under the guise of a Meowth. I had done it on a whim. Other Pokémon know what I am, my guise is designed only to fool humans. I come to and sit down on a park bench before letting out a sigh. It's almost dinnertime now; the sky is a yellow-flecked blue colour. I close my eyes and think.

. . .

"So what do you want to do now?" My eyes open. No longer am I in the park, now I'm in a field where giant sunflowers that tower over and surround me. They are facing the sun that's setting on the west, a breeze blows against them and seeds rain down from above. "Who said that?" I ask before looking around. "I did, Twain." The voice declares and a wide-eyed Mew with pallid purple fur steps into my view. My eyes widen before I back away from the intruder. "What's the matter, Twain?" She asks me. "You afraid?" I take another step back. "I'm not you and I'm never going to be you either." I tell her and turn away. "But Twain, I am you. Can't you see? _I_ am _you_." She says before pulling hard upon my ear. I turn and stare at her. Same blue eyes as mine, merely severely dilated. Similar purple fur albeit pallid and mussed. Even the same gay smile, yet she had a single crooked fang sticking out. She was right. She was me, but she was wrong too. She was the _me_ I knew once, long ago, but she was a stranger now.

"No, you are wrong. You _were_ me, but no more. I don't even know you anymore." She pauses; her grip loosens around my ear. Her eyes flicker nervously. "N-no! I am you!" she says as she trembles nervously. Her eyes sudden flash and unbidden fury rises. "Let me out Twain," she snares and a chill goes down my spine. "No." I breathe, steeling myself. "Let me out damnit!" She says once more. "No," I say repeating myself as well. I can see her grasp at straws; desperation etches her face as she realizes she was almost to the end of her rope. Suddenly she stiffens. "Sola . . ." My eyes as well as hers focus toward the voice. "Puccha . . ." The Pikachu stares at me with eyes full of concern and trust just as they always had before. "Don't," I say, "please don't Puccha," But the male ignores me.

"I was worried about you when you didn't come home. You left Alice and I without telling us where you were going. Years have passed now. . . ." He says. "Years? Whatever are you talking about?" I ask, but still I'm ignored. Mirror Mew smiles drunkenly. "Puccha," she purrs with malice in her eyes, "how are you?" she adds coyly. "You have no idea how much I have missed you. Why did you leave?" She smirks before replying in a tone filled with acid. "Because I hated living there, sure it was nice, for a day or two, but then it started to stink. You guys were so dull and I needed to get high without the problem of you guys nag at me like you would." My eyes widen, was this some sort of future? Would this happen to me? Why? "You don't mean that, you promised Alice that you'd return. We were so worried about you that night. You seemed so messed up and lost after the plate incident, but still. . ."

_Plate incident? Shit! That was tonight! _I realize. _Mirror Mew's already screwed up her life, and now she wants to ruin mine as well! _"So what?" she snaps and I give her the most hate filled glare I can manage. "You bitch, you no good bitch! I know what you've been doing, and I know why he isn't responding to me! He's a figment of your creation, therefore he's not the real Puccha and he's definitely not my Puccha!" I snarl as I lunge at her and bowl her over. I scratch her on the cheek. She shook me off before standing up. "Heh, _your_ Puccha? A little possessive there Twai-" she didn't get another word out for I lunged once more and punched her in the gut. "Never will I be you! Get the hell away and leave me alone!" I scream out, then, I turn and run away while she's still gasping for air.

I ran, ran as fast and as hard as I had ever ran before. I came to a cliff. When I approached the edge I knew the way out of this place, knew how to end it, if not temporarily, then once and for all. Everything feels real here, so wouldn't my death feel real? I didn't care so long an it only felt real. I jumped, falling head on into an oblivion of darkness.

My eyes open and I let out a relieved sigh as I find myself back upon the park bench. It's nighttime and I know that I best hurry home. Promises should be kept, lest they lose their value after all. I start to run, managing to arrive at the doorstep within a couple of minutes. I jump through the Poke-door and feel relief when I see that nothing has changed. Quietly I tiptoe to the living room and look inside. Puccha, sweet innocent Puccha is there along with Alice. Both of them are watching T.V. I walk inside and sit down beside the Pikachu. "Hey," I say.

Puccha looks at me and I notice something when I had jumped off the edge of the cliff . . . there had been a pair of eyes. Eyes watching me as I fell, they were watching me from within the darkness. And even though I was plummeting to what might be my death I felt giddy, happy, and free. Then, I had felt a pair of arms as they caught me before I could hit the bottom. That was what I needed, a new joyous sensation. A close fur-tingling feeling that comes from being close to someone closer than a friend.

"Hi, Sola, how was your walk?" he asks. I lean and press myself up against him more. _"I'll never quit trying to get out you know. I'll never stop!"_ Whispers Mirror Mew from within the prison I had locked her in. I know deep down that she's telling the truth. I ignore her. "Oh, it was just dreamy." I reply with a smile.


End file.
